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Oceanus Procellarum
Ubi Dubium, Ibi Libertas
List of Scenarios I Hope to Avoid 
15th-Feb-2009 07:31 pm
I hope I will never have to fight to the death with an Italian celebrity in order to win my freedom.

I hope I am never contractually obligated to land a helicopter on a rowboat.

I hope I never have to hide in a small wooden barrel with a martial artist in order to evade the Triads.

I hope I never wake up on the set of a Japanese game show speaking an alien language.

I hope I am not destined to defend all of humanity from the vengeful ghost of Julia Child.

I hope I never eat any kind of mystical jewel of untold power for any reason.

I hope I never accidentally conquer the world in a humorous but endearing manner.

I hope I never have to use my wits to trap an undead yeti dressed as Santa Claus.

I hope I never commit a crime so heinous that I am sentenced to be Rush Limbaugh's manservant-for-life.

I hope I never find myself in Hell, MI, on Labor Day, with only $2.31 in my wallet.

I hope I never cause friction or gravity to cease existing.

I hope I never have to reforge a magic sword using only the power of love.

I hope I am never held hostage on a bus to Rome, GA, when I meant to buy a plane ticket to Canberra, Australia.

I hope I never need to explain the rules of any sports to a sentient dolphin.
Comments 
16th-Feb-2009 04:16 am (UTC)
Funny...
Many of the things on this list are things I wish to happen to me.
16th-Feb-2009 05:20 am (UTC)
I hope I never accidentally conquer the world in a humorous but endearing manner.

I hope I do.
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